One and the Same
by Heart-Crossed
Summary: Liz is married to Zander...Jason's married to Courtney...and seeing each other feels like torture. Will they be able to find their way back to each other or will it always be a torturing encounter when they see each other? Features Liason angst in the most intense way.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: Anything remotely recognizable as being a part of the cannon General Hospital.**

**Claiming any artistic creativity thought up by yours truly. Copy Writers be fore shamed.**

* * *

**~*~  
****ONE AND THE SAME  
~*~**

Marriage. In any other part of the world, its best known as a sacred bond between two people who truly, deeply love each other. In Port Charles? Well, suffice to say that not all marriages are based off of love or even mutual respect for one another.

A success story for that town is best known in the form of Carly and Sonny Corinthos, who didn't get married out of love, but grew to love each other over time. If only all marriages in the town ended up that way.

Unfortunately for Jason Morgan and Elizabeth Webber, neither are fortunate enough to find love in their marriages. For how can one find love in a marriage when their hearts are with one another and not the one that they have pledged undying love to?

Sitting in her small makeshift studio, her old studio being too painful to enter, Elizabeth stares at the painting that she has been creating for over two weeks now. Its her first art piece that's actually intended to be sold. Sure, the buyer is Lila, but a client's a client. Even if its someone you know and love. In a way its better than a stranger, knowing its for Lila, she has pushed herself a lot harder than usual to make it perfect.

"Knock, knock." the sound of her husband's voice pulls her from her artistic focus. "Hey."

"Hey." she replies, rising to her feet, wiping her hands on her art apron. "Is it that time already?"

"Yeah." he smiles slightly, opening his arms for her when she gets to him, softly wrapping his arms around her. "You got lost in your art again, didn't you?"

"Guilty as charged." she says apologetically, stepping out of his embrace. "I'm sorry I lost track of time."

"Its okay." he assures her, shrugging his shoulders slightly. "I can drive myself to the airport. You should focus on your painting."

"I can take you." she insists, glancing over at her painting before looking at him. "I can just finish it up later."

"I know that look in your eyes." he counters, shaking his head firmly. "You stay...I'll just see you when I get back."

"Are you sure?" she looks at him, wondering if he could really read her as well as he thinks he can, shaking her head at the thought. If he could read her mind, she doubts he'd still be married to her by now.

"Yeah." he says lovingly. "I'm sure."

"Okay...be safe."

Taking a deep breath, Elizabeth wraps her arms around him, allowing him to hold her, to kiss her, before watching him pick up his bags and walk out the door. For a long moment, all she did was stand there, staring at the door that he had walked out of, wondering if he could see how she truly felt about him leaving town for the next few days.

If he could, he'd see just how relieved she was to be on her own. To be without him. As bad as that sounds, its worse because she knows its wrong, but she couldn't help it. Turning away from the door, Elizabeth returns to the painting for Lila, picking up her paint brush as she sits back down. The only constant thing in her life is her art and its the only thing she could stand to focus on now.

"Jase..." his wife's voice pulls him out of his work mode, prompting him to look up at her.

"Yeah?" he answers, knowing she needed him to respond before she'd continue. The simple fact that she had gained his attention wouldn't do.

"That was Carly." she says carefully, smiling at him sweetly. "She wants to go shopping and..."

"And?" he questions, arching his eyebrow, even if he already knows the answer.

"Well...can I go?" she asks him seriously, staring at him intently.

"Up to you." he says before turning his attention back to his files. "You know where we have a standing credit stream, right?"

"Of course." she exclaims happily, wrapping her arms around him from behind, kissing his neck fondly. "Thank you, thank you!"

Without a moment to waste, he listens as his wife gathers her things and breezes out the door without another word spoken. It was like that almost every day, whenever his best friend calls, his wife was out the door like a swift breeze, only coming back when she couldn't think of anything else to buy. If he actually cared to have her around, he would be upset with their shopping sprees, but he really didn't. Marrying her had been the sensible thing to do.

Regardless of his presence in her life, she'd still be a part of the life and therefore a target. Being married to him did nothing either way for her safety, not to mention she fit comfortably into his life, never asking for anything he couldn't give and always giving him anything he needed. She was the sensible choice. The right choice for his life.

A part of him was sure that she knows how he feels about their marriage, but he could be mistaken. She tells him she loves him almost all the time that he's grown used to hearing it by now, but he never utters it back. In no shape or form. If she minded it, she has yet to say anything to him, just the way he liked it.

Living in opposite parts of town, the two grow sick of the four walls that surround them, needing some fresh air. Elizabeth grabs her coat, making her way into town on foot, knowing that it would be the only way she was going to get anywhere while Zander was gone. Her car is down and he needed his to go to the airport.

Jason, well, he walks into the parking garage of his building, glancing at his motorcycle that has been sitting off to the side for little over two years now, covered in a couple layers of dust. Every time he has tried to ride it, memories would flood him that he just couldn't handle or cope with, forcing him to take alternative means of transportation.

Knowing the weather predictions for that day, he decides that its as good a time as any to get in a little simple exercise, prompting him to walk out into the town and head to the local diner. Food sounded pretty good right about then.

Arriving at the diner, the two come face to face, both frozen to the spot as they come into view. It was just her luck, she thought, while he thought the same about himself. Of all the people to run into, in all the places in the world, it had to be each other, it had to be there.

"Jason." she says first, staring into his eyes.

"Elizabeth." he replies in the same tone she used.

But not another word spoken, like every time before, and on their heels they spin, walking back from whence they came. Him, back to his penthouse and the piles of work that awaited him. Her, back to her small makeshift studio and the painting that she should be finished with in a matter of days. Neither allowing the memories to overcome them. Simply locking it away in the back of their minds, ignoring the pain and heartache, staying in the present.

"Zander, I know you're on a plane right now, but I just wanted to say that I missed you." she says, leaving a message on her husband's voicemail. "Hurry home...I love you."

"Courtney, I know you won't get this until you and Carly are waiting for your orders at whatever restaurant you decide to eat at." he says carefully, leaving a message on his wife's voicemail. "Hurry home. I'll be waiting."

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**Reviews politely encouraged! :D Hope you enjoyed!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: Anything remotely recognizable as being a part of the cannon General Hospital.**

**Claiming any artistic creativity thought up by yours truly. Copy Writers be fore shamed.**

* * *

**~*~  
****ONE AND THE SAME  
~*~**

Stepping back from the painting, Elizabeth smiles softly, staring at her masterpiece. It was beyond what she had envisioned and every part of her hopes that Lila would think the same thing. Resting against her easel is a very vibrant painting of Lila surrounded by her roses in her garden.

In all of Port Charles, there's no garden more beautiful than Lila's rose garden. Elizabeth has no idea how she does it, but Lila's roses are always vibrant and beautiful, even through the harshest of winters. No matter what kind of weather strikes the town, one thing you can always count on is Lila's garden looking beautiful. Just like the woman that grew them.

Knock.

Knock.

Knock.

Pulling open the door, Elizabeth smiles slightly at the sight of AJ Quartermaine, the only Quartermaine - other than Lila and Edward - that still likes her. Inviting him in, she shuts the door behind him, walking over to the painting to show it to him.

"I'm just waiting for it to dry, but once it does I'm going to bring it to Lila." she says with a bright smile. "I can't wait for her to see it."

"Elizabeth." AJ's voice is low, his heart aching.

"What do you think?" she pulls him to stand in front of it. "Do you like it?"

"Elizabeth." he says again, turning to face her, unable to look at the painting at the moment. "Its Lila..."

"What about Lila?" she looks at him confusedly, finally noticing the tone in his voice. "AJ, what's going on?"

"She's in the hospital." AJ says in a hushed tone, meeting her eyes. "Its not looking too good."

"Wha..." she gasps, looking at him, finally seeing what he was trying to say. "She's dying?"

"They don't know how much longer she has..." he sighs, shaking his head. "She's been asking for you and...I'm here to take you to her."

"This isn't real." she whispers, fighting off the tears, moving to stand in front of the painting. "This can't be real."

"We don't have much time, Liz."

Taking the painting from the easel, she walks out of her makeshift studio with AJ, tears frozen in her eyes the whole way to the hospital. She could tell that AJ wanted to say something, but just couldn't find the words to help her, opting to saying nothing at all.

She could tell because she felt the same way, wanting to ease his pain, but not having the words. All she could think of was Lila and what kind of world they'll be living in once she's gone. The more she tried, the harder it was, she just couldn't imagine a world without that vibrant woman.

"Grandmother's in the hospital." his sister's words finally sink in, causing him to force the mask to grace his face. "She's not going to make it, Jase...not this time."

"Does...does she know?" he voices, unable to take a full breath in, the pain just too much.

"If by 'she' you mean Elizabeth..." she sighs, shaking her head. "AJ left the same time I did...he should be taking her to GH by now."

"Good." Jason takes in a shaky breath. "Lila would want her to be there."

"Of course." she says, unable to hide the distaste in her words. "Lets go...they don't know how much longer she has."

"There was a time when you two were best friends..."

"There was a time when you two were in love." Emily counters, eyeing him firmly. "Things change...people change."

Accepting that, Jason follows his sister out of the penthouse and out to her waiting car, getting into the passenger seat and enduring the ride to the hospital. In spite of himself, Jason couldn't help but remember the look on Elizabeth's face when she lost her grandmother.

That pained look, that heartbroken torture, displayed for all to see. Now she's losing Lila, the woman that took the place of her grandmother in her life, he knows that look will be back. Maybe even more vibrant that the last time and he couldn't help but hope she'd be okay.

"Its beautiful." Lila's weary voice compliments, looking at the painting Elizabeth had brought for her. "I knew you'd do it justice, my dear."

"Its nothing compared to your garden." she sighs, moving to sit back down, placing the painting against the side table. "This isn't fair...you were supposed to live forever."

"No one lives forever, sweetheart." Lila places her weak hand on hers, smiling slightly. "You'll be okay. I know it."

"You don't know that."

"My only regret, my dear, when it comes to you..." Lila takes in a shaky breath, giving her hand a reassuring squeeze. "Is that I didn't live long enough to see you two find your way back to each other.""

"I don't understand..."

"Yes, you do." Lila gestures to the window, where Jason now stood. "True love, sweet girl, is a fire that cannot be put out. No matter how hard you try, no matter how hard you try to run, its there."

"We're both married to other people...there's nothing there."

"Its there." Lila places her hand over Elizabeth's heart. "Life has masked it, keeping it hidden from the world, but its there."

They talk for a moment longer, saying what needed to be said, before Elizabeth forces herself up from the chair, taking the painting with her - at Lila's insistence. With one last look at Lila, she walks out of the room, shutting the door behind her. Once she's out of there, she takes in a shaky breath, forcing the tears to stay locked in her eyes, unable to take them falling now.

"Elizabeth." his voice is pained, but he keeps the tone, as always.

"Jason." she says, without looking at him, taking another deep breath before walking off. Headed for the rooftop.

Accepting it was his turn with his grandmother, he opens the door and walks in, schooling his features as she comes into full view. She never looked so frail, so unlike herself, like she did right then. He tried to talk, but he didn't trust his voice, not after seeing her like this. He could feel his throat closing up, his heart aching, and his legs buckling beneath him.

They don't talk, knowing no words needed to be spoken, simply accepting what's before them and spending the time they had together while they had it. He takes her hand in his, holding it softly, pained by how weak her pulse is. This was all just too real for him, seeing her like this, it'll be burnt in his memory forever.

"Jason, where are you going?" Emily asks when he walks out of the room.

"To check on her." he says plainly, jabbing the elevator button. "She shouldn't be alone right now."

"You don't owe her anything." Emily says seriously, grabbing his arm to stop him from walking onto the elevator. "You should be here with us...with grandmother."

"Zander's out of town." he states, the man's name feeling like acid on his tongue. "She needs someone."

"Someone, yes." she agrees, accepting that much. "But not you...not after everything. Its not fair."

"I decide what's fair to me." he says plainly, even though the thought of being alone with Elizabeth sends an even deeper kind of pain into his heart. "And I'm not going to let her deal with losing Lila on her own."

Accepting that there was nothing more she could say or do, Emily releases her hold on him, watching as he gets onto the elevator and rides it up to the top floor. Shaking her head, she turns away from the metal doors to walk back to her grandmother's room, wanting to be there for her family.

Making it up to the rooftop, he finds her staring out at the town, her arms tightly wrapped around herself. For a moment, he's taken back to the day she lost her grandmother, how tightly she held herself. It was like she was trying to hold herself together. That if she held herself tight enough, she wouldn't fall to shambles on the floor beneath her.

"Elizabeth." he says in that too familiar tone.

"Jason." she replies in the same tone.

Carefully reaching out his hand, in spite of the pain he'd feel by touching her, Jason uses a good amount of strength to turn her around. He didn't know why, but he had to look her in the eye. The moment her eyes met his, he regretted it, seeing the heartbroken torture shining vibrantly in her eyes. With just one look, he could tell that she was barely hanging in there, barely by a thread.

"Don't." she states, a clear warning, but he doesn't listen.

Like many times before they ended, Jason softly pulls her into his arms, wrapping her up in his warm embrace. The moment his arms secure themselves around her, the tears tear through her, breaking down whatever reserve she had left. Any strength she had, that was keeping her together, is shattered in his hold.

As much as it hurt to hold her, to have her in his arms that way, he refused to let her go. Not when she had that look in her eyes, that heartbroken tortured look that made him weak at the knees and tore a whole through him like nothing else possibly could.

In spite of all the pain he must endure, of all the memories that this was bringing to the front of his mind, Jason holds her close, letting her cry her heart out. Knowing that he was the only one that she could do that with. The only one she'd drop her guard long enough to feel what she was feeling. The only one she didn't have to be strong with.

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**Reviews politely encouraged! :D Hope you enjoyed!**


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: Anything remotely recognizable as being a part of the cannon General Hospital.**

**Claiming any artistic creativity thought up by yours truly. Copy Writers be fore shamed.**

* * *

**~*~  
****ONE AND THE SAME  
~*~**

She wasn't sure how long she had been staring at the painting of Lila's garden, it could be minutes, it could be hours, not that it even mattered. Everything in her went numb the moment the machines were disconnected from Lila and the doctors called time of death. She couldn't think, she couldn't process anything, she just couldn't believe she was gone.

AJ dropped her home, not wanting to leave, but doing accepting that she needed to be alone and taking his leave. Since he left, she's been sitting there, just staring at the painting, wishing that she have finished it sooner, before she fell ill, maybe she would have had more time to admire it. To take her time looking at each and every detail, the way on Lila could, and seeing the picture like only she possibly could.

"Yeah?" she clears her throat before answering again. "Yeah?"

"Hey, I just heard." her husband's voice says with sadness over the phone. "I'm at the airport and I should be back by tomorrow. I'm sorry I wasn't there."

"Its okay." she says, tears filling her eyes. "You have a job to do...you can't be with me all the time."

"Still." he sighs, running one hand down his face. "I'm coming home to you and we'll get through this together, okay?"

"Okay." she whispers as the tears start to fall. "Be safe on your way back."

"Always." he assures her, glancing up at the boarding list. "I'm about to board my plane. I'll be home soon."

"Okay." she shakes her head, hearing a knock at the door. "Someone's at the door...hurry home."

"I'll be there before you know it."

Ending the call, she puts her phone down, walking out of her makeshift studio and into the main house, all the way to the front door. What she wasn't expecting was to find Edward standing on the other side, a soft smile on his lips, arms open to give her a warm hug in greeting.

"I apologize for just showing up like this, dear." Edward apologizes as she hangs up his coat before showing him into the living room. "We didn't get a chance to talk at the hospital."

"Understandably." she counters, pouring him a cup of tea. "With losing Lila, this is a time for your family..."

"Which includes you." Edward reminds her, placing a soft hand on hers. "My sweet Lila knew, like I do, that you and Jason will find your way...until then, you are still a very big part of my family."

"Edward..."

"I've digressed." he sighs, reaching into his pocket to pull out an envelope. "This is for you...for the painting you so generously created for Lila."

"I can't accept this." she shakes her head, pushing away the envelope. "She told me to keep it...it would be wrong to take money for it."

"You can and you will." he counters, placing the envelope in her hands. "Its what she would have wanted and we both know you won't go against that."

Accepting that she didn't have a leg to stand on, she reluctantly takes the envelope before settling in with a cup of tea, spending time with Edward before showing him out. Not before she gets roped into having dinner at the family home the following night, leaving her anxious to see what that dinner will bring. With only two people that actually like her in that house, Elizabeth knows that it'll be one hell of a time, especially for a Quartermaine dinner.

"Jason?" she looks at him, more than confused to find him on her doorstep. "What are you doing here?"

"Is he back?"

"No." she shakes her head. "He just caught a flight...he'll be back tomorrow. Why?"

"Can I come in?"

"Sure." she says simply, stepping aside to allow him in before shutting the door. "Should you even be here right now?"

"Probably not." he admits, turning around to face her. "Do you want me to leave?"

"What do you want me to say?" she counters, looking at him plainly. "I don't know what you want from me right now, Jason."

"I don't want anything." he says plainly. "I've stopped wanting anything from you the day we ended."

"Then why are you here?"

"I don't know." he sighs, shaking his head. "I left the hospital and then I was here...I don't know why...I just am."

"Beer?"

"Sure."

Walking into the kitchen, she grabs him a bottle of beer, deciding that alcohol was the last thing she needed and sticking to her tea. Neither knew why they were together in that moment, but they've learnt to not question it, accepting the unanswerable situations they always seemed to find themselves in.

"Lila left me a letter." Jason finally admits, setting his second empty bottle of beer down on the table. "I suspect that you'll be getting one, too."

"I think I might have already." Elizabeth concedes, reaching for the envelope that Edward left with her. "I haven't opened it...it has the payment for the painting I did for Lila."

"I know this may be pointless by now, but she wanted me to talk to you." he says carefully, unsure if he even wanted to do this. "About how we ended...about everything."

"Why would she want that?"

"I don't know." he sighs. "But it was her only request..."

"And you want to grant her this one last thing?" she counters. "Is that it?"

"We both know how we ended." he says simply. "What harm would it do to talk about it?"

"We've never talked about it." she points out, setting her cup down. "Not even when we ended...we never talked about the way we ended. We didn't talk at all."

"I know."

"What if I don't want to?" she counters. "What if I don't want to talk about how we ended? Then what?"

"Think about it." he states, rising to his feet. "I'm going to the family dinner tomorrow...if you change your mind...we'll talk then."

"There's no point in talking about it." she says seriously as he opens her front door. "We're over...have been for a long time...there's no point rehashing it all."

"Maybe." he agrees. "But its what Lila wanted...and we both know that what she wants always comes first...for both of us."

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**Reviews politely encouraged! :D Hope you enjoyed!**


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer: Anything remotely recognizable as being a part of the cannon General Hospital.**

**Claiming any artistic creativity thought up by yours truly. Copy Writers be fore shamed.**

* * *

**~*~  
****ONE AND THE SAME  
~*~**

The Quartermaine mansion is filled with immediate family and extended, all gathered to honor Lila's life the way Edward has planned it. Each with their spouses and some with their kids, everyone awaited the start of the family dinner, knowing that Edward would start once he was good and ready.

From the moment that Jason arrived, he's been searching the crowd of people for Elizabeth, but she has yet to arrive. A part of him wondered if she would duck out on the dinner after what he had told her the previous night, but the logical part of him knew that she wouldn't do that. Not when Edward passed along the invitation in person. Something he knows the elder man had kept in mind while doing it.

"I'd ask if you were looking for your wife, but we both know she's on a shopping trip with Carly." Emily says in that tone that she uses when bringing up a certain ex-bff. "Why are you looking for her?"

"Don't start with me right now, Em." he says warningly, turning away from the door. "This is neither the time nor the place."

"You're right." Emily shakes her head. "Its neither the time nor the place for you to be looking for her, of all people!"

"Don't start." he states, showing the warning in his eyes this time. "Go find your husband before I say something you'll regret."

"He's not here and you know it."

"Then go find Alan or Monica." he says simply. "Find someone else to bug."

"Jason, no matter what you think now, there was a reason you broke up with her." Emily sighs, shaking her head. "Just because we've lost Lila...don't forget that reason. She's not good for you...she's not good for any of us."

"I'm not gonna tell you again." he says plainly. "Go."

"Fine." Emily throws her hands up. "Don't say I didn't warn you."

"Dully noted."

Letting out the deep breath he hadn't known he was holding, Jason turns away from the sight of his sister walking off to scan the room once again. He wasn't sure if she was right, if he only felt like this because Lila's gone, but he just had to see her. To talk to her. To finally put everything out on the table and close the book on their relationship for good. Whatever the case may be, he just needs her to get there already.

"You sure you want to do this?" Zander asks her, holding her hand as they stand outside the Quartermaine door.

"I have to." she says simply, taking a deep breath. "For Lila and for Edward...I have to."

"Okay, but if you want to leave, just say the word." he says seriously. "Say the word and we're out, okay?"

"Okay." she smiles slightly, leaning in when he leans over to kiss her cheek. "I couldn't do this without you. You know that, right?"

"Its always good to hear I'm needed." he smiles slightly, securing her hand in his. "Ready?"

"Yeah." she shakes her head. "I'm ready."

Knocking on the door, the two of them wait for it to open up, both wondering what will await them when they walk inside. Being ushered inside by Reginald, she's wrapped up into a warm embrace, being told how much Lila loved her and how grateful she would be to know that Elizabeth was there at a time like that.

"Thank you." she says softly, stepping out of Reginald's embrace. "You were a very large part of her family, too, you know?"

"I know." Reginald assures. "A family I was very proud and honored to be a part of, I assure you."

"What are you doing here?" the accusing voice of Monica fills the foyer. "You're not welcome here! Neither of you!"

"I was invited." Elizabeth says simply, holding her husband's hand just a little too tight, causing him to jump into his defensive stance. "I'm sorry if that bothers you, but I'm not going anywhere."

"Not enough with the damage you've both done to my family, you have to cause more in our time of mourning?" Monica glares at them as if they were the scum of the earth.

"You hush now." Edward demands, walking over to greet Elizabeth. "I invited them and they'll be staying until I say otherwise."

"Of course you'd invite them." Monica rolls her eyes before walking off.

"Elizabeth, dear, I'm glad you could make it." Edward says as he wraps her up in a warm embrace. "Dinner is almost ready to start."

"Okay." she smiles slightly pulling away after a moment. "You remember my husband, don't you?"

"Of course." Edward shakes Zander's hand. "Glad you join our family at this time."

"My wife needs me." he says simply. "Nowhere I'd rather be."

"As it should be." Edward agrees, stepping to the side. "Come on in. Everyone's in the family room."

"I'm not so sure that's a great idea..." Elizabeth starts to say when Edward just shakes his head.

"You're family." Edward gives as his explanation, pushing open the door. "Join the others. Dinner will start soon."

The moment they walked into the room, all eyes were on them, making them feel more out of place than ever before. Holding firm to each other's hands, they walk further into the room, taking up a corner of their own as the doors close once again. Strangely, for both of them, they felt like they were being locked up for their own death sentence.

"You have a lot of nerve showing up here." Emily confronts both of them. "No matter what Edward says, you're not part of this family. You never were!"

"Back off, Emily, now." Zander states, stepping back when Elizabeth's hand pulls on his arm. "We're not here for you. Just leave us be."

"This is my family home!" Emily snaps. "You don't get to tell me what to do!"

"You're making a scene." Zander says in a hushed tone. "Everyone knows what you think of us...just walk away."

"I'll walk away when I'm good and ready." Emily states, turning her glare to Elizabeth. "If you have any decency left, you'll leave now and let my family grieve without having to see you."

"Edward wants me here." Elizabeth says softly. "I'm sorry if that bothers you, but I'm not going to walk away when he needs me to be here."

"He needs his family." Emily corrects. "Not you."

"Even if you don't like it, Edward sees me as family." Elizabeth defends. "I'm not leaving, Emily."

"I cannot believe how selfish you're being." Emily scoffs, shaking her head. "Then again...I probably can believe it...you've been a hell of a lot more selfish in the past."

"Enough!" Zander steps forward again, ignoring Elizabeth's hand holding him back this time. "You act like you have any right to criticize when, in truth, you have no right to judge us at all!"

"Excuse me?" Emily looks at him in disbelief.

"When Elizabeth and I got together, we were over for a long time!" Zander says angrily. "You made your choice and it wasn't me! I'm sorry if you were hurt in any way by what we did, but it had nothing to do with you! My life stopped revolving around you the moment you slept with Nikolas while we were together!"

"That's not fair." Emily practically shouts.

"Neither is your treatment of me and my wife!" Zander states, finally stepping back when Elizabeth yanks him back. "We're not here for you. We're here for Lila and Edward...so, suck it up and deal with it."

"This is neither the time nor the place for this." Jason says seriously, joining the group. "Walk away, Em."

"Wha...me?" Emily looks at him shocked.

"Walk away." Jason says seriously. "They were minding their business. You walked up to them, you walk away."

"I can't believe you're defending them." Emily scoffs, shaking her head. "You're my brother."

"And I'm telling you to walk away." Jason counters. "Go."

"This isn't over." Emily says to Zander and Elizabeth. "Not by a long shot."

"Have you thought about what I said?" Jason asks Elizabeth once Emily walks away.

"Uh...yeah." Elizabeth shakes her head. "What could it hurt?"

"My point exactly." Jason takes a deep breath before stepping to the side. "Shall we?"

"Um, yeah." Elizabeth turns to Zander. "See you later?"

"Yeah, go ahead." Zander shakes his head. "There's an overdue conversation that I need to have with my own ex."

"Take it easy on her." Elizabeth says softly. "She's going through a lot."

"And you're not?" he counters. "Go on...I'll behave myself."

"Okay." she smiles slightly before linking arms with Jason and walking off to Lila's garden. "Where do we start?"

"The beginning?" he suggests, shrugging his shoulders. "I'm not even sure."

"Are you sure you want to do this?"

"No." he admits. "But lets get it over with."

"Okay." she takes a deep breath. "I guess it all starts when we agreed to try."

"I guess its as good a place as any to start." he agrees, sitting down next to her on the bench. "You go first and I'll fill in my side."

"Okay." she agrees, shaking her head. "Lets get started then."

* * *

**Reviews politely encouraged! :D Hope you enjoyed!**


	5. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer: Anything remotely recognizable as being a part of the cannon General Hospital.**

**Claiming any artistic creativity thought up by yours truly. Copy Writers be fore shamed.**

* * *

**~*~  
****ONE AND THE SAME  
~*~**

Sitting by in stilled silence, Jason listens as she tells their history from her point of view, most of which he remembered exactly the same way. For most of the story, he didn't have to put in much, they both knew the ins and outs of how they started up. It seemed like the moment they said the fateful words that they'd try, the world fell upon them tenfold.

Then came the moments that he couldn't believe. He remembers doing all the things she's telling him, but he didn't remember it quite like that. Listening to her, Jason was starting to see where she was coming from, how things had changed so drastically, so easily.

"I went to Emily...I figured if anyone could tell me what was going on with you, it would be her." Elizabeth takes a deep breath. "That's when she told me..."

"Told you what?" Jason presses, the look in her eyes telling him that she didn't want to continue. "What did she tell you?"

"She...she..." Elizabeth shakes her head, cursing herself for still being affected by this now. After all this time. "She told me you weren't happy...that you had confided in her a week before and that...that you just couldn't see your life getting better if you didn't find a way to break it to me."

"Wha..." he looked at her like she was crazy, but then the conversation slowly comes back to him, bringing it to the forefront of his mind. "I can't believe this."

"Are you saying that you didn't have that conversation with her?" Elizabeth counters, watching as he stands up to start pacing.

"No...I did tell her that." Jason shakes his head, unknowingly sending a sharp pain through her heart. It was one thing to hear it from Emily, but another to hear it from him. "But I didn't mean it the way she took it."

"Okay, I'm confused."

"I told her that when we were in the middle of Sonny faking his death." Jason sighs, running one hand down his face. "It physically hurt to lie to you. Watching you trying to comfort me, hurting for me, when Sonny wasn't really dead. I knew that nothing in my life would ever get better if I couldn't find a way to tell you the truth. That Sonny was alive."

Elizabeth looks at him, unable to speak as he continues his pacing, her mind trying to grasp at what he was getting at. Sonny faking his death had taken its toll on the both of them. Even with that, though, it wasn't the true beginning of the end for them. Emily's conversation with her only got her to start truly seeing things that she had been avoiding.

"I couldn't very well tell her that Sonny wasn't dead." Jason mutters, stopping in front of her to look her in the eye. "I didn't even want to talk to her about it, but Emily just wouldn't stop pushing until I told her something...I never meant for her to take it that way."

"We all know words aren't your strong suit." she agrees, taking a deep breath.

"Continue." Jason says plainly, moving to sit down again. "What happened after Emily told you all that?"

"After that, I went home." she shakes her head. "For the rest of the night, I sat up in bed thinking about everything that happened since you lost Sonny. How you were gone a lot, for long periods of time, no calls or notes...nothing. Then I started thinking about the times we did see each other...how the moments were so empty...like you were pulling away from me."

"I only did that because lying to you was bad enough without having to see you living it."

"I didn't know that at the time!" she snaps, taking a deep breath before continuing. "More than anything, I just wanted us back. I wanted things to go back to the way it used to be...when you'd look at me like I was the only woman in the world...like I was all you wanted...all you could ever want."

Shutting her eyes, she forces that particular memory to subside, she couldn't take reliving it, even if she had to tell him about it in detail. She never wanted to believe that Emily was right. She never wanted to believe that she had become some kind of obligation to Jason, but the evidence was too damning.

"Then one day I saw you with Courtney on the docks." Elizabeth fights off the tears as she opens her eyes. "I saw the way you spoke to her, the way you looked at her and I just knew...I knew that I had lost you. That your heart wasn't mine anymore...that Emily was right and there was nothing I could do to change it. There was nothing for me to do, but end it...end us."

"So you slept with Zander?"

"I never slept with Zander!" she practically shouts, dropping her volume when he looks at her shocked. "Not that time, at least...it may have been stupid and juvenile, but it was the easiest way to get you to leave me...to break whatever obligation you thought you had...to set you free from me."

"I saw you..."

"You saw what I wanted you to see." she counters, swiping away at the tears. "I knew that walking in on Sonny and Carly was the end of what you had with Carly...I figured if you saw me and Zander...I knew you'd walk away from me forever."

"You wanna know the irony in that?" Jason locks his jaw for a moment, trying to control his emotions, to control himself. "I was talking to her about you...I was telling her about the Wind...about how I couldn't imagine my life without you...about how much I loved you."

Emily and Zander stand toe to toe, both just as stubborn as always, neither backing down. Emily feels justified in her standings, Zander believes that he's justified, neither willing to admit they could both be justified. Or that they could both be wrong.

"Why you?" Emily snaps. "Huh? Why did she have to pick you?"

"She needed someone she could trust." Zander states plainly. "She needed someone that she could trust to not take advantage."

"I don't believe you!" Emily glares at him, angry to her core. "You're lying! I know you two slept together, Jason told me!"

"The way you told Elizabeth that Jason wasn't happy with her?" Zander counters. "The way you made her believe that she was holding him back? That he no longer loved her? The way you dropped subtle hints the following weeks about Courtney being the one Jason wanted."

"He told me he wasn't happy...among other things."

"Jason told you all that?" Zander arches his eyebrow. "I highly doubt that the man of few words spilled his guts to you."

"What does it matter?" Emily sighs, rolling her eyes. "Elizabeth had no right using you to prove her point."

"You and your family act like Elizabeth betrayed you. Like she did something wrong, when she didn't." Zander shakes his head. "Whether you believe me or not, we didn't sleep together that time."

"She didn't betray me by sleeping with you!" Emily snaps. "She betrayed me by marrying you!"

"What?"

"You don't love her!" Emily pushes him. "And she doesn't love you! Yet you married each other!"

"What does it matter to you if we're in love with each other or not?!"

"You deserve more!" Emily's tears start to fall. "After everything that happened...you deserve more than this. And she should have known better! I told her...I begged her not to marry you!"

"That's why she almost called it off...I can't believe you!" he shakes his head. "I may not be in love with Elizabeth and she may not be in love with me, but we do love each other. We're best friends...we trust each other and we truly care for one another."

"Is that really enough?"

"Yes...its enough." Zander says plainly. "I was in love once...quite frankly, I'd rather have what I have with Elizabeth than to fall into something like what I had with you again."

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**Reviews politely encouraged! :D Hope you enjoyed!**


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